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    November 24

    大病初愈

    多少眼泪可以换一份平静?多少愤怒可以换一份释然?

       最近倒多的是眼泪,抬起头,倒流进心里的是一丝丝恨意。

       最对不起的是妈妈,说好第二天给她打电话的,可是先是病了两天,不敢打电话怕她担心;然后哭了一整天,亦不能打电话。不知她现在是不是挂心着我,又想起人家说“养个女儿有什么用”。

        我是很迷信的人,相信所谓的因果报应,我的痛,是不是因为曾经让别人那么痛。其实现在,我很明了如何伤害那个让我伤痛的人,只是那样并不能减轻我的痛,还会伤害更多的人。我不是个隐忍的人,但竟也忍着了,有时甚至可以笑着说“没事”。也许别人不以为然,对我也算是进步了。

        我向不是会报复的人,伤了、痛了,也不会把伤口露在外面;只是我也不是坚强的人,现今,我可以为了不知值不值得的理由忍着。等到了极限,等到了不堪重负,就放手独自去疗伤吧。

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